A lot of us do not cope with change and prefer to stay feeling comfortable however stagnant that may be. In time you can feel bored, resentful, agitated and procrastinate to name a few feelings when you avoid change.
Here are 7 steps that will support you as you enter a New Year and allow change to become part of your life.
1. Identify the worst
Understanding a change is the important first step to managing it. We’re usually scared of change because we’re afraid of the unknown. Try to figure out if the worst that can happen is as bad as what you think can happen? Learning about the details of the change can help things feel easier. Remember how scary the idea of starting high school or learning to drive once was? Sometimes it’s not as bad as it may seem at first, and it just takes a little time to get used to.
2. Ask yourself how much is in your circle of control
When a big change happens, figure out how if it’s something you have control over, and how much control you have. Understanding your role and how much you can change, can sometimes help you to put things in perspective. For example, if you’ve just moved, there are many things you can do to make it an easier process. Other changes like unexpected sickness are harder to control
3. Focus on the positives
Focusing on the positives can help you feel better about the change overall. They might not be completely obvious to begin with, and it might also take some time, but it’s worth it. For example, if you’ve moved recently, you might be away from your friends, but it’s also a great way to learn how to be more independent. In time, you might also find a new group of friends to keep you company.
4. Move your arms and legs: take action
If the unwanted change is within your control, taking an active approach to coping has been shown to be useful. Try engaging in problem solving or goal setting to proactively address unwanted developments. Focusing on the problem at hand, developing a plan of action, and asking for advice are useful active strategies.
5. Working thru the 5 stages of grief to acceptance
The 5 stages of grief are denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. If the unwanted change is beyond your control, taking a reflective approach may be the way to go. Accepting that there are things beyond your control and choosing to be comfortable with this is likely to bring greater calm. Viewing change as an opportunity to learn and grow, rather than a setback, might support you. Allowing yourself to feel the different emotions is crucial for healing.
6. Manage your Stress
The skill to managing stress is crucial to cope with change. Practising yoga, mindfulness, mediation, or any other relaxation techniques is so very important.
7. Ask for help
Everyone at different times in their life needs to learn to deal with stress. Asking for support weather its friends or family or a professional is not a sign of weakness it’s not a sin that sometimes you cannot shoulder it all yourself. Vulnerability is a fabulous quality.