Ways to Create Connection with Your Partner

By |2022-02-06T15:15:03+10:00February 7th, 2022|Counselling in Brisbane, Counselling in the Redlands, Couples, Life Coaching, Marriage Counselling, Self Esteem, Self help|

  Let's discuss ways to create a connection with your partner. It’s extremely sad when couples stop trying and stop making their relationship a priority. They get inside their heads and hold onto resentment and worry about the future. What’s needed is to live in the present and to have a healthy dialogue regularly of what’s happening right here and now. Your intimate relationship is precious and taking responsibility for your part in it to be your best version in this partnership is crucial. We have a habit of projecting our own needs onto our partners and believe they are going to … Read More

Stop trying so hard to make your partner happy

By |2021-12-06T13:19:21+10:00January 17th, 2022|Counselling in Brisbane, Counselling in the Redlands, Couples, General, Marriage Counselling, Self help|

Stop trying so hard to make your partner happy “I just want to make my partner happy” is a very common comment I hear in working in therapy with couples. Is it your responsibility to make your partner happy? What happens when you do everything you can, and your partner is still not happy? For example, make them dinner, earn a great income, be attentive and caring, mow the yard, take your partner on a holiday, do all the washing, plan the budget, stop drinking alcohol, stop taking drugs, play more with the children, ask less for sex and more and more … Read More

Top 5 Tips for women to be interested in sex again

By |2021-12-06T15:29:16+10:00December 20th, 2021|Counselling in Brisbane, Counselling in the Redlands, Couples, General, Life Coaching, Marriage Counselling, Self Esteem, Self help, Unlock all of you|

Top 5 Tips for women to be interested in sex again I’ve discovered over the years of working with couples that women are often the first to pull away from intimacy and ultimately the sexual relationship. The unravelling often begins when children come into the picture. A lot of changes in your intimate relationship and the pressure that this puts on you both and your sexual relationship is enormous. Did you know that sex encourages intimacy? Orgasms release oxytocin which is a feel-good bonding hormone. Sex helps you feel closer to your partner. You must check in with each other and understand … Read More

From feeling trapped to deep loving growth

By |2021-12-06T13:20:57+10:00December 6th, 2021|Counselling in Brisbane, Counselling in the Redlands, Couples, Life Coaching, Marriage Counselling, Self help|

From feeling trapped to deep loving growth “I feel trapped, caged, controlled and stifled.” This is not an uncommon statement I hear in my room from couples I’m working with. I explain to be free of the relationship might help for a time but the best path to personal growth and self-empowerment is to stay with the one you love. When you are on your own it’s easy, however, there is no personal growth. You can control who you see, when and how much you want to be part of this. They say nice things and leave when you have had enough. … Read More

Show yourself some loving

By |2021-11-21T19:30:27+10:00November 22nd, 2021|Counselling in Brisbane, Counselling in the Redlands, Couples, Life Coaching, Marriage Counselling, Self help, Unlock all of you|

Show yourself some loving In the first session with me I often ask, “so how much self-care do you do?” That’s always an indicator as to how much self-love you have for yourself. So many of us neglect ourselves, reject ourselves, put ourselves way down in the pecking order. I get it, it’s extremely challenging to balance all the moving parts of your life and having specific roles often takes first place. Too often we feel boxed into roles with expectations that continue to wear us down. The two large areas are Mums overworked juggling, children, career, households, and relationships. The other … Read More

Free yourself from your arguing and fighting

By |2021-11-04T12:37:53+10:00November 8th, 2021|Counselling in Brisbane, Counselling in the Redlands, Couples, Marriage Counselling, Self help|

Free yourself from your arguing and fighting. The biggest breakup to relationships is the bickering and the disconnect.  Your impatience, annoyance, and intolerance of your partner breaks down the communication and connection. This didn’t suddenly begin to happen for you, it’s been slowly building and festering over the years. Do you see the only way out as splitting, divorcing, and going your separate ways? I’ve seen over the years of working with couples who split they then realize after the split that a lot of what was going on was their own unfinished emotional business and unresolved grief. The disowning your feelings … Read More

Two Million Dollars and a New Partner

By |2021-10-25T12:11:53+10:00October 25th, 2021|Counselling in Brisbane, Counselling in the Redlands, Couples, General, Life Coaching, Marriage Counselling, Self help|

Two million dollars and a new partner - “I will be happy when I have the cash and the new man.  Let’s also add in the new career, new wardrobe and the flash car.” Is this you? You are highly charged, reactive and swing like a pendulum according to the outside triggers. This is a tough way to live life and a lot of us live like this.  Safety, security and worth is something outside of yourself.  So great is our thirst to be seen, validated, and approved of it that sets us up for living unauthentically, in a false way. It … Read More

Is Lockdown a shutdown in your relationship?

By |2021-09-21T15:42:38+10:00October 11th, 2021|Anxiety, Counselling in Brisbane, Counselling in the Redlands, Couples, General, Life Coaching, Marriage Counselling, Self Esteem|

Is Lockdown a shutdown in your relationship? Lockdown is a container that is a great test for whether a relationship can thrive or not.  All relationships take focus and priority, especially in covid times. If couples accept the reality of what there is and focus on building: Communication Connection Commitment Fun Growth Trust  Lockdown is a wonderful opportunity to build a great foundation for their relationship. If instead, they choose to be frustrated by the limitations, the restrictions and what is wrong that can cause the foundations to crumble, and the relationship beginning to break down. I believe we haven’t yet seen … Read More

Questions and Answers

By |2021-09-05T19:34:18+10:00September 27th, 2021|Counselling in Brisbane, Counselling in the Redlands, Couples, General, Life Coaching, Marriage Counselling, Self Esteem, Self help|

Questions and Answers Here’s four questions that I received recently; names removed for confidentiality. 1. How am I to make the difficult choice to divorce when I know my marriage is over but feel so much shame and stigma? Reframing your thoughts and beliefs surrounding divorce can be very helpful. I struggled with this and what supported me was to see the divorce wasn’t a break from anything on the outside. It was a divorce from my own past My false self My pleaser self My unauthenticity self My own ego It was a divorce from the fear and victim mentality When … Read More

The mistakes you don’t know you are making

By |2021-09-05T19:37:30+10:00September 13th, 2021|Counselling in Brisbane, Counselling in the Redlands, Couples, Life Coaching, Marriage Counselling|

The mistakes you don't know you are making A very common problem I see and have lived myself is co-dependency.  This is a relationship pattern that focuses on others at the expense of yourself. It relies on external validation. Seeking approval from others, seldom from yourself. It is common for co-dependent people to be people pleasers. What causes co-dependency? Co-dependency results from not being able to fully love yourself, be independent of others, give yourself love, attention, or validation. Couples often become co-dependent because each person cannot recognize their own worth without feeling cared for and/or needed by the other. In other … Read More

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