Do you know negative people are called drain people because they zap you of your energy? Are you one of these people? You may not actually realize you are. It can slowly build up over time and you may feel and think negatively because people in your life are negative towards you; it can be a vivacious cycle. It’s about taking 100% responsibility for your own feeling, thoughts and behaviours. Sometimes when you’re negative you can at times be rude and dismissive, passive aggressive, silent treatment, gossip, over react. You may start to feel like you don’t have control and that others are influencing your emotions.
So even thou you feel other people are making you negative and that you have no control, you actually do. People can influence how you feel, but only if you let them.
Here are a few things you can remember to gain control and break the cycle of negativity, so you don’t pass it on, because it can be contagious if you let it.
- Stop the cycle and tell yourself that you are not to blame for this negativity if it is coming from others, blame is what makes us take words personally
- Take the higher road and do not react to negativity. This is what the other person wants; it’s their business, not yours.
- Put in boundaries and know them and assert them
- Look in to yourself instead of outside yourself. Have compassion for yourself, what do you most need at this moment?
The most effective tool if your negative and blaming others is the Work of Byron Katie. I use this allot in my practice and find it very effective and clients gain clarity and strength. The work is simply four questions that when applied to a specific problem; enable you to see what is troubling you in an entirely different light.