How to feel sexy and deserving of love
You have lost interest in sex with your partner, you’re just not feeling it. This is so common particularly for women with children. I have many couples coming in weekly where the woman has lost interest in sex and her libido is nonexistent. The man is tired of being rejected.
Digging a little deeper women, it’s the body confidence that has disappeared since the children have sucked you dry, pardon the pun.
Let’s get your sexy happening so you feel deserving of love to give yourself and receive from your partner.
The first place to start is how to love your body: You have to love yourself, feel turned on, tuned in and turned on.
Every day, stand in front of a mirror naked, or as close to naked as you can tolerate, and write down (or speak it out) everything you like about what you see. It could be your lips or your fingernails.
It may be strange at first, but it will help you notice all the beautiful things about your body over time. Start with a little handheld mirror if a large mirror is too overwhelming.
“What happens is you teach your brain to notice how beautiful your body already is, which helps to immunize you against all the critical messages that tell you your body is supposed to be different,” You will begin to feel different.
Listen to your body
So how do you feel sexy and deserving of love? One of the fastest ways to improve your relationship with your body overall is to listen to it. The first step in your process of reconnecting with your body is allowing yourself to listen to the message it has to tell you.
Maybe you have an ache in a part of your body that has been hurting for months and you need to book an appointment with a massage therapist, chiropractor, or physiotherapist.
Listen to your body. It wants you to know what it wants you to know.
Simply by taking the step of listening to it, it will start to relax, feel more important and heard, and it will begin to give you the gifts that it can only give you when it is high functioning and happy.
Catch yourself criticizing your body
We all criticize our physical appearance in some small (or large) way.
First, every time you catch yourself insulting your body/appearance, don’t beat yourself up for noticing. Be grateful that you noticed at all because, remember, that’s a good thing that you’re aware of your unhelpful thought patterns.
Then, to counteract some of the negativity you’ve thrown at yourself, immediately think of three things you love and are grateful for about your body.
This practice will take time to become proficient at. It’s certainly easier said than done. And it might feel cheesy when you’re doing it. But it will be so beneficial in helping you love your body. And you’ll remember all of the things that – “Oh yeah!” – you actually love about how you look.
Move your gorgeous body
Remember that “living in your head” is very unhealthy.
Do anything that feels fun, compelling, and that gets you into your body. Go dancing, walk, play volleyball, hire a boxing instructor to teach you how to fight. Whatever you find fun, do that.
Touch your beautiful body
Another great way to love your body more is to give it the physical manifestation of love… touch! Massage yourself or receive one, cuddling, giving your body what it needs.
Tune in to what your body wants moment to moment
It’s as simple as that! This will help you feel sexy and deserving of love.
If you want to love your body… listen to it, be consciously grateful for it, appreciate others’ bodies, move it, touch it, and spoil it. Incorporate several or all of the above tips and you’ll deeply love your body in no time. This may then lead to you loving your partner loving you, but it begins with you first.
Tune in to my Empowered Marriage Podcast to learn more. This fortnight’s podcast is available now and discusses this topic in more depth.